CarbonStated

The lights are dimmed. The fog machines are cranked to 11. Roadies franticly duct tape mic chords to the ground.  This is the night you have waited for…until, WFT?? An ice-cold bud light (or any domestic beer, we don’t discriminate) streams down your neck and back. Great, there goes the vintage tee that you specifically ordained to be apart of this night.  The show is over (for you) before it begins thanks to some jackass and his butterfingers. Hopefully The Dixie Chicks don’t see you as you take the walk of shame to the exit.

Attending a show (or “concert”, we will use show for our purposes) is more than just standing there listening to music. You are assigned a very important task upon entering the venue. Ready? Here is it. DON’T RUIN THE SHOW FOR ANYONE ELSE! As simple as this seems, many people struggle to keep themselves and their cold ones in check. Save yourself the embarrassment and remember the following rules:

If you are tall, do not stand in the front. Sorry, looks like we do discriminate. I know it’s not your fault…but it doesn’t matter. Do us all a favor and stand in the back or on the sides…or kneel.

If you plan on enjoying some ice-cold refreshment, BE CAREFUL. Drink enough so you feel good, but put on the brakes beyond that. No one wants to see your beer hurled at them while you are giggling hysterically.

Do NOT yell at the band while they’re onstage. When the band is done with a song, the last thing they or anyone else wants to hear is you test out your newfound drunk confidence. To the guy who yelled, “Did they make you chip in for gas?” to the opening band for Death Cab for Cutie, you suck. I’ve been waiting 3 years to tell you that.

Have some sort of knowledge of who you are seeing and what songs they play. Nothing is more annoying than, “Hey, what song is this?”, “Hey, what was this song again?” “Sorry, but I don’t remember what you just said, what is the name of the song that the band on stage is currently playing?” “Wait, what band is this? Where are they from? What song is this?”

See, that wasn’t so hard.  You’ll be not pissing people off in no time!

*please disregard the list when attending a show by this band.