CarbonStated

The intertubes have provided the opportunity for a biological term to find a new life. "Meme" is defined as "an element of a culture or system of behavior that may be considered to be passed from one individual to another by nongenetic means, especially imitation." If the internet has fried your brain, an internet meme is a phenomenon replicated throughout the internet via imitation. If you still don't get it, think to that lame 25 Random Things fad that took over Facebook for a few weeks. That's a meme, my friends, and, on the internet, memes make the world go round.

"Numa Numa," "Chocolate Rain," the Bill O'Reilly freak out: these are all internet memes. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, you friend are not attuned to the weird, the wonderful, the waste-of-times that make up the internet.

But, fear not, you too can be as "cool" as your neighborhood Internet Whore. Okay, not as cool as me, but the dorks in IT won't make that much fun of you anymore. Check out Greg Rutter's Definitive List of the 99 Things You Should Have Already Experienced on the Internet Unless You're a Loser or Old Something (http://www.youshouldhaveseenthis.com/). Enjoy the next three hours of mind-numbing internet education.

The internet is full of empty promises, one of which are the ubiquitous ads promising to teach you the secrets to getting upgraded to first/business class.  Of course, we all want to sit in front of the plane.  We all want to be the target of those envious looks of people streaming past us to the steerage compartment.  With a drink in one hand and your legs stretched, the skies are far more comfortable.  Your Local Internet Whore has flown in the front of the plane a few times and can report that the upgrade is worth it.

But let's be frank, unless you have several tens of thousands in your bank or frequently flyer account, you are not getting anywhere near first class.  And, please, don't be an asshole and just sit up there.  The flight attendants are far smarter than you.

Your next best bet is to avoid those really shitty seats in coach.  You know, the seats that don't recline or force you to enjoy the odiferous deposits of your fellow passengers in the lavatories. To the rescue, comes www.seatguru.com.  With seat maps and reviews of every seat on every major airline, you can sit in the "better" seats in coach and avoid the worst.  Without fail, your YLIW always checks the site before picking my seats.  Trust me, your life will be better though I cannot guarantee that the middle seat will be taken by the physical equivalent of two people, if you know what I mean.  Happy travels!